The False Collar - Story Time, Episode 67 (Unabridged)

There was once a fine gentleman, all of whose moveables were a boot-jack and a hair-comb: but he had the finest false collars in the world; and it is about one of these collars that we are now to hear a story. - It was so old, that it began to think of marriage; and it happened that it came to be washed in company with a garter...