The Evolutionary Human: How Darwin Got It Wrong: It Was Never About Species, It Was Always About Consciousness

For most people, finding their vocation or calling usually begins with a feeling of unease or boredom about their job, profession, or chosen career—with the work they thought would enable them to feel secure by providing them with a good income and prospects for advancement leading to increased wealth, authority, or power.
Uncovering your soul’s purpose not only brings vitality to your life, it also sparks your creativity. You will become more intuitive and spend more time in a state of flow—being present in what you are doing and feeling committed and passionate about your work.

From a parental perspective, guiding rather than controlling, allowing rather than preventing, encouraging rather than denigrating, and trusting rather than doubting, gives teenagers space to safely explore who they are and find their sense of identity in the larger world outside the family home. The most important thing is to spend time with your teenager.

At the conforming stage of development, love is experienced through the satisfaction of our safety and protection needs. This is when the emotional mind experiences stability. The emotional mind experiences instability—a lack of love—when its love and belonging needs are not met.

Towards the end of the conforming stages of development, around the age of seven or eight, the rational mind (the neocortex), which has been developing in the background, gradually takes over from the emotional mind as our conscious interface with the world. The focus of the rational mind is on security—keeping us safe from harm and supporting us in finding our place in the world

f the child’s emotional mind feels unfairly treated, instead of becoming angry with its parents, the child may repress the anger it is feeling and blame itself. The child blames itself because it is afraid to show anger towards its parents: if it does show anger towards its parents, it realizes that it might be more difficult to get its safety needs met in the future. This is when your inner critic is born—the voice of judgement about not being worthy or good enough to receive the love we are seeking. Unless it is dealt with, the emotional instability thus caused does not go away. It is always there in the background, influencing the child’s and the adult’s subconscious decision-making.

When the emotional mind becomes dominant, the body mind becomes the subconscious of the emotional mind and the soul mind is pushed further into the background. It becomes the unconscious of the emotional mind. It still has some influence over the thoughts of the child, but these are less overriding than before.

At the serving stage of development, you learn how to contribute to the well-being of humanity and the planet. If you have any leftover fears from the differentiating stage of development—fears regarding your self-confidence and competence—they will show up at this stage of development. A lack of trust in your abilities and competence is a severe handicap for serving others.

At the integrating stage of development, you learn how to connect with others in unconditional loving relationships, so you can actualize your gifts and talents and thereby make a difference in your world. If you have any leftover fears from the conforming stage of development—fears regarding your ability to form loving relationships—they will show up at this stage of development. A lack of emotional and social intelligence is a severe handicap for integrating.

This process can involve a shift in your sense of identity. If you do not feel aligned with the values and beliefs of your parents or your community, you must find a new identity. This can be a difficult time in your life. In the time between letting go of your old identity, and finding and embracing a new identity, you can become vulnerable and insecure. Finding an answer to the question “Who am I?” becomes an important priority. This may lead you on a spiritual quest.

finding freedom and autonomy—